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辦公室有人哭了,如何應(yīng)對?

辦公室有人哭了,如何應(yīng)對?

Katherine Reynolds Lewis 2014年07月28日
職場不相信眼淚。但人是脆弱的動物,深陷重重壓力的職場中人難免情緒失控。不論是自己流淚,還是看到別人流淚,面對這種意外情況,你該如何應(yīng)對?

????之后,要繼續(xù)前進。克萊曼說道:“要忘記它。只要你自己把這件事忘掉,其他人就不會記住它。”

????這項建議也適用于別人在你面前哭泣的時候。不要在這件事上花費太多精力,把它當(dāng)作一個小插曲,盡快放下,繼續(xù)前進。

????哭泣的好處

????盡管從來沒有專家建議把哭泣作為職業(yè)成功的策略,但這種情況也有一絲亮點。眼淚可以是消除誤會的良藥。

????零售公司CST Brands的CEO吉姆?鮑爾斯很少在工作中哭泣。在此前供職的一家公司,她曾經(jīng)負責(zé)一筆漫長的交易,與交易對手經(jīng)過了無數(shù)次談判,最終還是以失敗告終。她把書摔在桌子上,說了一些過激的話,然后快步離開會議室。在一個沒有人的走廊,她終于放聲大哭起來。

????鮑爾斯回憶道:“那是幾周甚至幾個月的情緒積累。以前從未經(jīng)歷過如此艱難的事情。我很羨慕那些能夠承受住壓力繼續(xù)前行的人。對于我來說,每一次人際交往都是私人往來。在他們身處困境的時候,我卻無能為力,我不喜歡這種感覺?!?/p>

????她找了一個安靜的地方讓自己恢復(fù)冷靜,然后團隊繼續(xù)討論。雖然鮑爾斯更愿意控制自己的脾氣,但她沒有在這件事上糾結(jié)下去。事實上,談判甚至可能加快了節(jié)奏,因為她的突然爆發(fā)讓會議室里的所有人認識到,討論已經(jīng)拖延了很長時間。她說道:“我的突然崩潰可能有所幫助,因為在他們看來,我應(yīng)該是房間里最后一個撐不下去的人?!?/p>

????作為非營利機構(gòu)Food & Friends的執(zhí)行董事,克雷格?施耐德曼每天接觸的都是患有艾滋病、癌癥和其他疑難雜癥的人,還有為這些人提供食物的員工和志愿者。這份工作并不輕松,有時候會變得情緒化,不過這是好事。

????施耐德曼回憶起一位需要Food&Friends服務(wù)的熟人,她剛剛30多歲,與他的孩子年齡相仿。他說道:“有時候,流淚是一種溝通的方式。每當(dāng)我想到那位女士,我都會想起自己的孩子。”

????與同事談到這種情形時,他流下了眼淚,但他欣然接受這種經(jīng)歷。他說道:“這種經(jīng)歷很好,因為它將我與我的畢生事業(yè)強有力地聯(lián)系在一起?!保ㄘ敻恢形木W(wǎng))

????譯者:劉進龍/汪皓

????Then, move on. “Just get over it. Everyone else will forget about it if you forget about it,” Kleiman says.

????That’s good advice if you’re on the receiving end of tears as well. Don’t make a big deal about it, and try to move past the incident.

????The upside to crying

????While no expert would recommend crying as a strategy for career success, there is a silver lining. Tears can be cathartic or a means of clearing the air.

????Kim Bowers, CEO of retailer CST Brands, only rarely has been pushed to the point of crying at work. At a previous company, she was in the middle of a lengthy transaction, going through the umpteenth negotiation session with the counterparty, when she finally lost it. She slammed books, made some intemperate comments, and quickly left the conference room. She sought out an empty corridor where she ultimately burst into tears.

????“It was a buildup of weeks and months. Nothing has ever been as tough,” Bowers recalls. “I envy folks that have the ability to absorb it and move on. Every interaction I have is personal. When they go poorly and I can’t fix it, I don’t like that.”

????She found a quiet place to regain her composure, and the team continued with the discussions. While Bowers would have preferred to have kept her temper, she didn’t dwell on the incident. In fact, the negotiations may even have picked up pace because the outburst brought home to everyone in the room how drawn-out the discussions had become. “It probably helped that I snapped because I was the last person in the room they expected to snap,” she says.

????As executive director of nonprofit Food & Friends, Craig Shniderman works on a daily basis with adults living with AIDS, cancer, and other challenging illnesses, as well as his team of staff and volunteers who provide meals to those individuals. It’s difficult work that sometimes becomes emotional, and that’s a good thing.

????“Sometimes, to tear up is a way of communicating,” Shniderman says, recalling a time when an acquaintance of his needed Food & Friends service—someone in her early 30s, the same age as his own child. “When I thought about that woman, I thought about my own child.”

????Talking to a colleague about the situation, he started to tear up, and he welcomed the experience. “It was actually good because it connected me in a very powerful way to the work I do in my life,” he says.

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